Post by Mousy677 on Oct 10, 2010 2:50:28 GMT -5
Name:
Age:
Race:
Native or new arrival?:
Occupation:
Appearance:
Shut up, you.
Anyway, I wear sort-of-military clothes (I think they are. Rook can't help, since he's blind, and all...) - they were the only things I had, and somehow I have managed not to get them very dirty, despite them being white. Don't even ask how I managed it, because I have no idea. Anyway, I wear a long-sleeved white button-down short, which, come to think of it, has a blood-stain under the collar, from when...
No, I promised myself that I wouldn't think about that...
Umm... Where was I?
Oh, right.
I wear a long-sleeved white button-down shirt, with a black tie, for no apparent reason apart from the fact that I want to (which, in my opinion, is a pretty good reason...), over which I wear a white jacket.
Ah. That jacket. It doesn't sound like much, does it? Well, it is. As I said, it's white, but the cuffs and shoulders are brown, edged with gold trim. Also, around the undersides of the sleeves, and in the lining of the jacket itself, are embroidered Sakura - that's cherry - flowers. The ones on the undersides of the sleeves are dark brown - the same colour as the lining, but the ones in the lining are gold, like the edging on the cuffs. The buttons are a nice shade of gold, not too harsh, but not too soft at the same time, and the collar is high and black, with gold around the edge. It's not the sort of thing that anyone would notice, but I like it. It's a nice sort of detail.
I wear white trousers (a whole lot of white, now that I come to put it all down on paper...), and black shoes. In one of the belt loops on the trousers there is a siver chain with a silver wolf (with an abstract pattern on one side, in turquoise, red, black, white and dark blue, with a sort of smile. It looks like it was made my a three-year-old, but... that's abstract for you).
That's it, I think.
Yeah, that's it.
Oh, it isn't. I'm usually to be found with Chimchar on my shoulder.[/ul]
History:
Thousands of vulnerable children are abused.
And I was one of the children who was abused.
Yes. For the first two years of my life, I was relatively happy: I lived with my family (mother, father, older brother, younger twin brothers, sister), and I never seemed to land in any trouble. I also actually spoke a bit, which is relatively unusual. No-one ever thought that what happened would ever happen to me.
On my second birthday, though, I was sent to live with my aunt and uncle, and that was pretty much when the abuse started. I never really ate much - I just never did: I have a really low metabolism, so I can eat a very small amount and not really need to eat until I notice that I'm particularly hungry, and I usually dono't, so I might not eat for a day, then realize that I haven't eaten for a day so eat something and then not eat for another day. I don't know why, I just do.
Umm, anyway. Past. No, that's present.
I lived with them until I was five, and then (finally) someone noticed that I was being abused (I think it was when my older brother came for a visit and he noticed that I wasn't sitting normally but more sort of kneeling, and leaned over. He called the social workers, and my uncle and aunt were taking to prison, and I ended up in a care home - don't ask why; I still had parents - where I lived until I was something along the lines of twelve.
When I actually arrived at the care-home, the first peoplson I met was the oldest resident, a nineteen-year-old girl, called Kestrel, but who went by Clay. I never found out why, and she never really found out so much about me - I mean, I rarely spoke and all, so it was probably quite difficult for her to communicate with me, so... uhh... Yeah.
Rook has known Clay for about three days (or was it five minutes?) longer than I have.
He was the only person I liked, other than Clay, although I still wouldn't speak to him, because I'm just naturally really shy. Just one of those things. Rook once said - when we were about twelve - that it really creeped him out at the time. He said that it probably also creeped other people out (but, by the seems of it, not Clay) but they just lived with it.
But then there was Smudge. He was seventeen when I was five, and pretty much completely mad, but also Clay's friend. If Clay wasn't with Robert (her ex-boyfriend) or me and Rook or at work, she would always be found with Smudge. If memory serves, though, Smudge was disagnosed with Disossiative Identity Disorder and Delusional Disorder, which probably explains why he switched randomly from being really kind to completely and utterly mad. If I remember right, he was also sadistic and one personality was Self-Defeating. He was weird. But I still remember this one time him saying to me (bear in mind that I was still pretty badly cut-up over my aunt and uncle and not being able to live with my siblings), "Ah, you'll be fine, kid. Just trust me." I guess I probably should have trusted him.
Before long, I got adopted, and I got a rather good feeling about that from the start: I ended up living with a fifteen-year-old boy (who I mistook for a girl, incidentally), six-year-old twins who hated each-other, a very cheerful eight-year-old girl and a stoic eight-year-old boy who was rather unfriendly, but very cunning at the same time.
After two weeks - just when everything seemed just about settled; I actually spoke a bit, and I had started being friends with people again - the fifteen-year-old (Ice. No really, that is his name) got a phone call at something like 1AM. He didn't tell us what it was until the next morning.
Our parents had been in a car crash.
We went, ironically, back to the Orphanage where I had lived before, and things got pretty quickly back to norma-[/color]
If I could just interject here?
Huh? Oh, right. Go ahead, Rook.
Things did NOT get back to normal quickly: first you were crying all the time, and then that whole thing with Arthur, Alfred, Matthew and Peter, and not to mention all that whatnot with Ice and Smudge.
Yeah, true... You done interjecting.
Yeah. Carry on.
OK, thanks.
If you're wondering, all of that is true, and Rook is possibly just trying to spite me, or he's genuinely trying to be helpful [/ul]
Personality:
[/ul]U-umm... If I had to tell you one thing about myself, it would be that I'm painfully insecure - it's mostly because of my past, and all, which I explained earlier, and I'm not going down that particular road again. It always depresses me.
Umm, anyway; I'm pretty insecure about most things, but particularly being around Rook - it only really started when Ice started making those jokes whe-
Ambrose, you're rambling again.
OK, sorry.
I'm most insecure, like I said, about being around Rook. We still live together and all, but I usually stay out most of the day, and get back when he's asleep. Just to avoid anything uncomfortable. Even though Rook's blind, he can somehow always tell when I feel uncomfortable. When I do, he always tends to either give me some space or annoy me.
Umm... On annoying me. Pretty much only Rook can do that, mostly because he can rile me so easily. Seriously; if there's anything that makes me uncomfortable, it's Rook acting as though we're a couple. Although I have a reason. Once again, I'm not going to go in to a complicated ramble, but just know that.
I really like my Chimchar. She is the first Pokemon I ever got, and, I guess, the only one I've ever really formed a strong enough bond with. She hates being in her Poke Ball, though. That's why she usually sits on my shoulder.
Umm... Stuttering. You probably noticed, but I stumble over words a lot, and I say umm a lot. It's... just one of those things that goes with my past, like most of my other aspects - such as the Childhood Disintergration Disorder, which, while inconvenient, I outgrew.
Umm... I have PTSD - all that happened to me after that horrible first year at the Orphanage caused it. Rook has helped me get through it, though. He does have a use, see!
Uhh... One of the offshoots of the PTSD is Avoidant Personality Disorder, which according to my Medical Dictionary, is,
"Anxious (Avoidant) Personality Disorder is a condition characterized by extreme shyness, feelings of inadequacy, and sensitivity to rejection. These individuals feel inferior to others. This disorder is only diagnosed when these behaviors become persistent and very disabling or distressing. This diagnosis should be used with great caution in children and adolescents for whom shy and avoidant behavior may be appropriate (e.g., new immigrants)."
Yup. Fits the bill perfectly.
Umm, the effect on me of this is that I'm really shy - this is the most I've spoken all this year - but I can also be quite violent, which is called Hyper-Arousal. I have once or twice struck Rook, thinking he was someone he wasn't. It doesn't really seem to bother him, though, because he understands about it - while he doesn't have PTSD, he freaks out quite easily.
Uhh... Another common side-effect/symptom of PTSD is the Thousand-Yard Stare. I have that, but Rook can usually snap his fingers in front of my face or something to bring me out of it. It's quite irritating, though.
I tend to go in to re-experience really easily: Rook can always tell when, and I can sometimes tell that I'm going to get it. I always find that I start crying. Rook's really sweet about it: he either leaves me alone if I want him to, but he sometimes sits with me. He's really sweet about it, like I've said.
Umm, anyway. Oh, I said to say "Umm, anyway" a lot. I don't know why. I just do.
That's me, I guess.
Powers:
Umm... What on earth are you talking about...? I...don't have any...
Team:
Chimchar | Lv. 20 | Female | Flame Wheel, Scratch, Ember, Fury Swipes | Brave.
HP: 66
Attack: 51
Defense: 41
Speed: 43
Special Attack: 47
Special Defense: 41
TOTAL: 290
Staraptor | Lv. 80 | Male | Fly, Aerial Ace, Take Down, Close Combat. | Adamant.
HP: 301
Attack: 299
Defense: 192
Speed: 240
Special Attack: 144
Special Defense: 160
TOTAL: 1325
Starter:
[/blockquote][/blockquote]
Chimchar | Lv. 20 | Female | Flame Wheel, Scratch, Ember, Fury Swipes | Brave.
HP: 66
Attack: 51
Defense: 41
Speed: 43
Special Attack: 47
Special Defense: 41
TOTAL: 290
Other:
[/size][/color]If you were wondering about all that burbling stuff about Rook, that's because he's painfully insecure about his sexuality. Well, he would be, given his past.
Also, the things in italics are me talking to him.
I don't RP in first person! I promise! I just find describing characters easier.
Uhh, anyway (Ambrose got my verbal tic). I'm Mousy. I'm thirteen and I have been RPing since I was seven or so, and my specialty per characters is those with mental disorders. Ambrose is my real challenge, though. I've never written a character with PTSD before. My level is Literate-Advanced (so I have a Skilled Writer thing, but it doesn't reside in my signature), and... yeah (Ambrose got BOTH my verbal tics).